A Unique Friendship: A Tribute and A Farewell

Source: Bru-nO/Pixabay   The morning of October 5, 2021, The New York Times republished a July 13, 2012 article written by Alex Williams, “Why is it hard to make friends over 30?” Williams considered his own experiences and the social science research, citing conversations with two of my favorite experts on personal relationships, Laura Carstensen, who has helped us understand “socioemotional selectivity”, and Rebecca Adams, the authority on episodic friendships. Williams laments the challenges we face in developing [...]

To Show Love, Receive With Grace

Source: BattershellTactical/Pixabay So often our early experiences interfere with responding to others in a fully open way, free of distortions or interpretations that have little or nothing to do with their intentions.  Similarly, our emotions can cloud and misdirect our responses to the gifts of others.  To consider how we can best receive offerings from those we love, read my post from "Life Refracted" on PsychologyToday.com by clicking here.

2018-01-31T21:03:54+00:00December 24th, 2017|Categories: Close Relationships of many kinds, Life, Refracted|

Beware Behaviors that can Threaten a Love Relationship!

Source: Olichel/Pixabay Understanding the motivations of those who may threaten a love relationship is one thing.  Common motives are described here. Identifying behaviors through which those motives are expressed is a separate task.  To review a list of behaviors that can undermine the integrity of a couple, create conflict within it, or derail one partner with resulting damage to the couple relationship, read my post from "Life, Refracted" on PsychologyToday.com by clicking here.

2018-01-31T21:03:54+00:00December 8th, 2017|Categories: Aspects of Loving, Close Relationships of many kinds, Life, Refracted|

Find the Silver Lining

Source: geralt/pixabay   Life does indeed have negative experiences and too much negativity can challenge our relationships. The good news is that negative experiences can be transformed.  Consider taking a new look at moments that have nothing to do with us, times we misunderstand one another, our underlying assumptions, and ways in which we may assign blame.  To read about these examples and some ways to approach them, read my post on PsychologyToday.com's "Life, Refracted" by clicking here. [...]

2018-01-31T21:03:54+00:00November 24th, 2017|Categories: Close Relationships of many kinds, Life, Refracted, Transformation|

Addressing Conflicts Helps Love Grow

Source: amarpreet25/Pixabay Conflict between two people is inevitable. When conflicts of time and place, demands, priorities, power, planning  or how much closeness is optimal erupt, sensitive responses can build understanding and increase faith in the strength of the relationship.  To read 52 Ways to Show I Love You:  Address the Conflicts in "Life, Refracted" on PsychologyToday.com, click here.

2018-01-31T21:03:55+00:00October 27th, 2017|Categories: Aspects of Loving, Close Relationships of many kinds, Life, Refracted|

Dinner at Home or Do We Go Out?

Source: StockSnap/Pixabay The times we live in and the roles that we play change how we share precious moments with those we love. Among those are the meals that we share. To find some thoughts about our own need to adapt and ways in which we can do it, click here to read my post from Psychology Today's "Life, Refracted" blog.

2018-01-31T21:03:55+00:00October 13th, 2017|Categories: Aspects of Loving, Close Relationships of many kinds, Life, Refracted|

Silence Can Have Several Meanings

People can sensitively show love by accurately understanding the many meanings of silence.  Before they can respond with love (the topic for next week), they must be able to distinguish among silences that are active listening, time for reflection, avoiding creating distraction, an invitation to communion, attention being elsewhere, delaying confict, or expressing anger.  For details, please visit the latest, "52 Ways to Show I Love You: Identify the Meanings of Silence", by clicking here.

2018-01-31T21:03:56+00:00September 1st, 2017|Categories: Aspects of Loving, Close Relationships of many kinds, Life, Refracted|

Providing Care is Such a Vivid Way to Show Love

Source: sathyatripodi/Pixabay When a person is dependent - young, old, ill, disabled - or fragile or simply in need of outside help, providing the care that they need can show through actions in a resounding way.  At one extreme, it reflects "Compassionate Love", that altruistic and selfless behavior in which someone else's needs can take precedence over our own.  To read "52 Ways to Show I Love You: Caring and Caregiving", click here.    

2018-01-31T21:03:56+00:00August 25th, 2017|Categories: Close Relationships of many kinds, Life, Refracted|

Expanding the Circle of Those you Love Can Make Love More Real

When we expand our couple's embrace to include those we love beyond it, we can bring more joy into our own hearts and those of others.  Doing so may have challenges but the efforts are always worthwhile. See what I wrote about "Expanding the Circle" on Life, Refracted, by clicking here.

2018-01-31T21:03:56+00:00August 18th, 2017|Categories: Aspects of Loving, Close Relationships of many kinds, Life, Refracted|
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